100 word challenge number 2

In the darkness, all Jiya could see was Annabelle and the dim road in the moonlight. It was risky, slipping out to the party without her parent’s permission, but Annabelle had insisted they go. ‘I’ll be grounded if we get found’ panicked Jiya. ‘It’s fine, we’ll only go for an hour. Nobody will notice’ reassured Annabelle. But Jiya’s heart stopped. Her dad’s car was slowly winding down the road. They’d been found. ‘Run!’ hissed Annabelle, pulling Jiya along by the arm. But as they turned the corner, the two slammed into a tall, shadowy man. A man with a knife.

briannal27kns

Hey guys! Brianna here: part-time fangirl, dancer, pianist, some other stuff, and an all around amazing person! :)

5 thoughts to “100 word challenge number 2”

  1. I like your 100WC Brianna. You have used some good vocabulary which has helped to create a tense atmosphere. Also, you have left me wanting to read more! Remember to start a new line when using speech and a new person speaks.

  2. I really love your story! It got me hooked in right at the start! I wander what’s going to happen next. I really hope it all goes well for the girls in your story!

    Taumarumui NZ

    Turaki primary school

  3. I really like the way you ended the story, the suspense. You used many a lot of details in your writing and it made your story really interesting (:

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